Thursday, April 14, 2005

MOST DISTURBING MUSIC VIDEO FEATURING MR. T EVER.

Mr. T...uh, sings? raps? wears camo shorts that are alarming? Draw your own conclusions.

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

THEOLOGICAL INVESTIGATIONS INTO THE PERSON OF NICK VAN SANTEN

34 - And Another Moment

(That's Nick, aka "Chewbacca," on the left.) Yours truly is the one being groped on the right.

Nick has already been the recipient of one tribute from this blog; he is now the recipient of an unprecedented second tribute, in honor of his 23rd birthday, this past Saturday.

Nick, when I met your friend Nathan when he was here visiting, I didn’t have much time to talk, so I just pointed at you and said: “Nick’s a big monkey.” And I thought for a moment I’d said something awkward, until Nathan looked right back at me and simply nodded. “Yes,” he said, “he is.” Nick: you are a big, big monkey. Sometimes you don’t shower. Sometimes you don’t shave. Sometimes your body emits strange odors. Sometimes you unexpectedly hug me, for protracted periods of time that border on the awkward. Sometimes, rather than get up and walk the 10 feet from your room to the bathroom, you pee in a Nalgene bottle and store it until it’s full.

Sometimes you grope my nipples. Sometimes you go into Josh’s room at 10.30 at night to give him a ‘tuck-in,’ wherein you tuck in the fully-grown 26-year old Josh into his bed and pat his head before leaving. Sometimes you bust into Gary’s room at 1 AM, waking the clearly groggy, mildly irritated Gary with this question: “Dude, are you sleeping? Dude. I MISS you!” You refer to your car (a Subaru, naturally) as having “all-wheel sex appeal.”

You and I have odd, and oddly one-sided, conversations. They go like this:

Me: Hey.
Nick: BRUNER!
Me: Hey.
(pause)
Nick: Dude. You’re so LUTHERAN right now!!!! (hugs me)

We all still talk like you. This joke has not gotten old since I blogged about it in November. It’s perfectly acceptable to approach any member of the seminary community—well, not Iain Torrance, but almost anybody—and massage their arm, and say, “Hey, dude, are we cool?” Odds are, they’ll get the joke.

Nick. We (and I do mean we, an inclusive we, all of us here, who live with you, eat with you, study with you, and make fun of you, because of all of those other things) are so, so grateful for you. We’re grateful for your gifts of humor and intelligence, enthusiasm and compassion, and your loyal friendship. We miss you when you’re not around. You add a desperately needed dose of West-Coast-evangelical loving to this place. You are gifted, and we are gifted by you.

Happy birthday, homeslice.

PROPHETIC VOICES

I am opposed to slavery, not because it enslaves the black man, but because it enslaves man. And were all the slaveholders in this land men of color, and the slaves white men, I would be as thorough and uncompromising an abolitionist as I now am; for whatever and whenever I may see a being in the form of a man, enslaved by his fellowman, without respect to his complexion, I shall lift my voice to plead his cause, against all the claims of his proud oppressor; and I shall do it not merely from the sympathy which man feels towards suffering man, but because God, the living God, whom I dare not disobey, has commanded me to open my mouth for the dumb, and to plead the cause of the oppressed.

Bishop Daniel Payne of the African Methodist Episcopal Church, 1839.

Citation from God of the Oppressed, by James Cone.

I COMMAND RESPECT IN ALL I DO...

I COMMAND RESPECT IN ALL I DO

...is my entry in the caption contest for this photo. Please contribute.

Sunday, April 03, 2005

BASEBALL RETURNS TODAY

Thank heaven.

This is the year. Really. Go Cubs!